DCL 2.3 Instruction | The Charisma Principle

The Charisma Principle: People Are Interested in the Person Who Is Interested in Them

It has been said, “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” The idea is simple. If you want to connect with others, focus on them, not on yourself. This is what charisma is about. This simple phrase should be a guide to all leaders: People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. This requires listening, outward focus, an inquiring mind and a desire to help people see how they add value to others.

Video Presentation: John Hull, CEO/President, EQUIP


Biblical Case Study: Jonathan (1 Samuel 18:1-4; 20:1-42)

Jonathan and David’s relationship in 1 Samuel is a vivid example of this kind of focus. Jonathan loved David as much as he loved himself (1 Samuel 18:1). Jonathan was a partner to David, helping him to become king. Notice these characteristics that Jonathan possessed; they enabled him to connect with David:

1. Jonathan was available and dependable: He made time for David’s needs (1 Samuel 18:1-4). He was a person David could count on at any time (1  Samuel 18:5-17).

2. Jonathan was vulnerable and responsible: He took risks in order to protect and ensure David’s future (1 Samuel 18:18-33). He was committed to do what was right, even if it hurt him (1 Samuel 18:34-42).


How to Build Your Charisma

  • Become genuinely interested in other people.
  • Smile often.
  • Remember that a person’s name is important to them.
  • Be a good listener.
  • Sincerely make the other person feel important.



  • Do I usually focus on others and their interests or my own?


DCL Meditation and Inspiration Media and Notes  © Willow Creek Association
DCL Instruction Media and Notes © EQUIP Million Leaders Mandate Volume 2